10:11pm( why do I get sleepy so soon)
Daily Goal : 1667 words
Words written : 1153 words
Total today: 4211words
Days Left: 27 days
Thoughts and feelings. I feel like I need to plan my scenes better and somehow come up with a note taking system to remember what I last wrote instead of reading through everything. It doesn’t make sense but I just want to finish this at this point and get something done. I feel super sleepy and I feel good that I got back into this. I do not think I l planned well enough but it is nice to figure out methods I don’t think might have worked for future purposes.I have an outline for the beginning , middle and end but I do not have enough In -betweens ( plot developing Chapters.)
Good Night to you all!
Proverbs 14:30New International Version (NIV)
30 A heart at peace gives life to the body,
but envy rots the bones.
Recently I have been feeling a bit of envy at different people. Look what this one has that I don’t etc. I was surprised at one point wondering why do I feel so bitter? So negative?Why though? It was such a waste of time, allowing my thoughts to focus on someone’s life so much, that I could barely enjoy my own God given days?I am healthy and intelligent. My family has so much more than we should have considering our bank accounts. We are fortunate and blessed. How dare me. It’s as if the moment you trip and lose your footing for a few minutes and you let that one thought grow. It wants to grow an entire forest of jealousy in your heart. That’s when we need to stop and look around at our own life where it matters. It’s also where I know that I have been slacking spiritually and I let that tiny crack within me be open and vulnerable. I am blessed. I am very blessed.
I wish it were an April Fools Joke but I haven’t written for maybe 3 days. I’m too embarrassed to count( or even blog). Not even sure what I been doing. Days just flew by. Anyway the point is I did 566 words this morning , definitely need to keep going, I almost forgot the rhythm of my first few paragraphs. Will get to the Goal (1667) when I get home tonight and get an update in.
Just keep going…Just keep going. Geez it’s already April.
Daily Goal : 1667 words
Words written : 1284 words
Skipped one day but that’s okay, just keep going
Total today: 3056 words
Days Left: 28 days
Thoughts and feelings. Not sure why but as soon as I decided to write so many things happened. Was disappointed that I missed a day of writing but I will just add a day to my usual and that will happen if ever I miss a day. Today’s word flow was pretty good but words not sure if they made sense. Shouldn’t they make sense at least on day 2?. Did a bit in the morning and the rest in the night. I want to try splitting up the words in case one day I am too tired in the night. Found myself a little side job helping someone during the day so Won’t be able to go on during the day like I had hoped but still quite fun. Feel energized after work out. Since I am sleep typing and can barely spell if not for spell check Goodnight! Have a blessed tomorrow.
We all know this. It’s like one of those things that we forget while we’re busy worrying about tomorrow . It happens to me all the time but it seems to be one of those human things so I must be normal. Lately more and more I have been in my head day dreaming about my future , one better than today. Dreaming about where I want to be and who I want to be, someone better than the me today. Though these dreams are wonderful and give me a little smile of pleasure, the me now can’t help but feel a bit offended. I realized I was overly worrying once again.
So yet again I was brought back into the present, down from my dream cloud and with a grateful perspective I saw the me today. In that moment I was doing a yoga practice and I tried to feel my back when It stretched or my hips when it opened. I tried to be patient when the instructor said to just breathe and not let my mind wonder to tens of thousand different things. It was a relief, a much needed break for my active dream machine, to stop for a second and live in today.
Most of the times we don’t realize when we have stopped living in the present. Worrying is like a habit ingrained so firmly that it feels like the phrase “Time flies when you’re having fun” but instead, time flies when you’re worrying. In the worst way time flies because we take with us only the negative as we’ve worried so much that we never knew the positive.
I do not know if it is possible to remove worrying as if it were part of a “removing bad habit challenge” but I do know that sometimes when I notice how stuck I was in that moment of Living in the future, What usually brings me back is the appreciation of today. At first you may even feel a bit surprised because you haven’t appreciated enough and for such a long time. Look how healthy, how alive you are. How beautiful and worthwhile.
Gentle reminder if you are in a season of worry right now.Bring it in. It’s a new day we have been given. Tomorrow won’t come if you don’t have yourself today. I want to remind myself of this. I need me today. Today is necessary. Tomorrow starts today. It’s going to be an amazingly wonderful day and I want to be present in it.